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Hey there!

It’s been forever since my last post, and even longer since I started this blog. I haven’t changed very much though – and that’s quite frightening.

There have been changes in my life situation, that’s for sure. I’m no longer broke and unemployed. I found love. Then it broke. I’ve moved to a place some people would describe as «arctic wilderness». I live in Norway however, so there’s a limit to how wild it gets around here. I’m still a brat: In my late twenties and still unsatisfied with myself and my life, waiting for the next Monday to turn it all around.

I suspect I’ve had a mild depression for a while now. The winter blues came early this time. Then there’s the fact that winters last full eight months up here. I really shouldn’t complain, with all the privileges I have, but duuuuuude… It’s been dark.

I’m not sure when it happened, but I guess I have decided to empty my saving account. It’s not that huge (my years of full employment can easily be counted) and what are money for anyway? They bring me no pleasure slowly growing in the bank.

Which is why I have bought a camera and ticket to Kenya. I got four weeks off from work.

I need to fulfill some dreams.

Join me for the journey.

  • Ksenia

PS.

Today I upgraded to premium account.

Do you like my new theme?

The week couldn’t have started better

Oh, Irelaland!

Some brief days in Dublin visiting friends, and I already consider moving to the Green Island.

I came on a Monday and left on a Wednesday (barely, there were some trouble getting to the airport in time… due to TRAFFIC) with the best impression.

Ireland

A couple vacation days, a journey and lots of hours chatting with your girlfriends – sometimes that is all you need to remember how to enjoy life.

Ireland

I might have gotten a minor concussion too, on Tuesday night, while dancing.

You know those movies where the main character gets hit hard in the head and then develops some kind of power, like reading peoples minds? Or changes personality, forgets certain people or who they are themselves?

I haven’t figured out if got a super power along with the head bump. I chose to think some things cleared up when my scull and the floor connected though.

I’ve been thinking so much lately, about how to love myself more, and what I want to with my life, and how I can be happier. I’m not ready to put words on it yet, but I feel lighter.

Go to Dublin, maybe you will feel it too.

“There are two days in the week on which I never worry; one is yesterday and the other is tomorrow.”

Robert Jones Burdette 1844 – 1914

 

Who is Nina?

Nina is my roommate, as of August 2017.

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We met when I moved north two years earlier, and we haven’t run out of things to talk about yet. Whether the topic is everyday life, our body shapes, sex, work, philosophy and self-development, business plans, childhood in Russia, travel plans or youtube videos –  we are always having a great time.

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Can you believe we are in our late twenties?

Nina is on a constant journey… somewhere. Really, in the two years we’ve known each other, my wonderful friend signed up for several schools online and traveled regularly to workshops in different countries (and she has always come back with crazy stories). She has introduced various concepts of psychology to me, the latest being Human Design. I’m telling Nina she should start writing a blog, about the different “trainings” she chooses to dive into. So far, she hasn’t wanted to… But you can get to know her a little bit here, as a very important piece in the Arctic Puzzle.

Birthday
Nina sings “Happy Birthday” to me ❤
Halloween
She’s the Lady in Red on my Halloween Party.
Midnight Sun in Alta
Nina says she doen’t like the “outdoors”, but we’re working on it 😉

PS: This post was originally a part of the Arctic Puzzle-project. Which totally fell. But whatevs 😀

The vacation galleries

The day has come!

As I left work today, I had this happy feeling in my tummy, called VACATION!

It will only last a week, but this I know: A week of vacation and traveling is worth many weeks of everyday life. My colleagues will barely notice that I’m gone, while I will feel that a lifetime has passed when I see them again.

Yay.

I’m celebrating by packing and looking up my old traveling galleries ❤

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Marked day, Seguin – Haiti
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Freetown Christiania in Copenhagen
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It always rains in Bergen
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Boat-tripping in Turkey
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Russian city-beach, Lipetzk ❤
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Dreamy Havana
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Bye bye, Holland

Where did you fly last time you got on a plane?

The curse of a small town

Everyone sees everything.

You will know what I’m talking about if your town has one street, one shopping centre, one pub, one club, one… well, only one option for pretty much everything. And if you have an ex – then you will get the dangers of leaving your house.

You can have a normal day until you see your ex’s car (which there is only one of around here) drive up to the parking lot in front of the mall, with a female passenger who reaches to his shoulder when he hugs her on the way in.

You might stay inside on a Saturday night, but your friends will not. And they will tell how intimately he danced with her, before sending you a message in the early morning hours, asking if you are awake. I was not awake, fortunately.

So I didn’t blog yesterday. It took me approximately one minute to find The New Girl on Facebook and become utterly depressed. She’s gorgeous. I tried drowning my sorrows in ice cream and watched Netflix.

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Is it stalking if it only takes one minute?

Today, I’m trying to focus on how I’m doing quite fine in the moment, and not stress about the mistakes of the past, the future or other people. I’m trying to focus on me… I want to do something nice for myself.

I’m washing my clothes and cleaning my room. Again >_<

Maybe you have some good advice for me, Great Internet. What can I do to feel better?

(PS: Nobody must see me.)

Bye-bye elections!

My last post probably gave a hint that I’m living through a troubled period in my life. I wrote it when I was very sad.

Then I didn’t write anything for a month, haha. After buying a premium plan – so much for serious goals like writing every day!

Instead I’ve been busy with moping and work.

Norway just had elections. And my foreign friends keep asking me: Who won?

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Work, work, work, work, work.

It’s hard to explain. If you ask ME (which you shouldn’t on this matter), I would say the electoral system of Norway is almost impossible to fathom.

So I’ll explain in as few words as possible (read The Guardian to understand more):

The left wing (red) got more votes, but the right wing (blue) won the election. The prime minister of the Right party, Erna Solberg, keeps her position for another term. She is choosing her ministers right now, in accordance with other parties who got a respectable amount of votes. The blue parties in the right wing got 88 seats in the parlament, and the red parties got 81 seats.

This might mean that the taxes will be lowered sometime during the next four years, we might see more privatization and Norway will probably continue to search for oil in the Arctic. All this might have happened anyways. The difference between the right and the left side is not always clear. Norway’s parties mostly place somewhere in the centre.

ENOUGH.ABOUT.POLITICS.

IT’S FRIDAY!

The first evening in the rest of my life 😉

When your heart is mourning

… what do you do?

I’ve been on a journey and I wanted to share that with you, tell you the story and show you my pictures of the magnificent North.

Instead, I got home to my lovely new apartment which I spent the whole Sunday decorating, and started crying.

In order to give me some helpful advice, I guess you should know why I’m crying my eyes out. The answer is good old heartbreak.

Why do you think I have a new apartment and moving in with Nina?

Today I realized I haven’t talked with my ex in two days. None of us called the other. I started thinking and the tears flowed.

My love, why couldn’t you just love me back, accepting me as I am?

I think I loved you like that. Now I’m just hurt, but I could fall back into it if you would just make some effort – maybe a little gesture, like inviting me to celebrate our two year anniversary even though a couple weeks have passed since the actual date.

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Snapping approximately two years ago.

It’s stupid, right?

I feel stupid, and not at all like looking at the pictures from my journey. Guess which photos I’ve been searching up instead?

What I’m going to do now is… play some Candy Crush.

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Enter a caption. No, thanks.

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